09/10
Cultivate a High View
Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.
Ephesians 5:25
...not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.
Hebrews 10:25
Those that be planted in the house of the LORD Shall flourish in the courts of our God.
Psalm 92:13
One of the most important things we can do for our children is to both demonstrate and promote a high view of the things God has a high view of in our lives. So, what are the things God has a high view of and values? We know from scripture that God values family, marriage, the local church, serving, and generosity among other things. The point here is that God's highest priorities should also be our highest priorities. God's values should be our values. God's vision should be our vision. In that way, our children, who are always watching and learning from us (even if we don't think they are), will have a much higher likelihood of adopting those same priorities, values, and vision in their own lives as they grow into adulthood.
So what does that look like in everyday life? To hold a high view and value family as God does means that we as parents set the tone of the household and make time for family. We eat dinner together. We schedule nights when the family is together, without screens, talking and laughing together. This does not happen by accident or automatically by default; we must be intentional as parents to cultivate and lead in this. Holding a high view of marriage means that we demonstrate this by spending time with our spouse, scheduling date nights, modeling what it means to love and serve one another, and how to show affection. It also means we are careful to speak highly of marriage at all times. We don't allow ourselves to complain or vent about our spouse or degrade marriage as being a burden or a 'ball & chain'. This type of destructive talk promotes a low view of what God has a high view of. It is also planting seeds in your impressionable children's minds that are contrary to what God's word says. Be careful how you speak! Be careful that you speak highly of what God has spoken highly of.
When it comes to the local church, which is described as the Bride of Christ in scripture, this means that we as parents set the tone and prioritize going to church as a family, being involved, planting and generously giving of our time, talent, and treasure. Your convictions or lack of convictions in this area are being seen by your children. They will discern if you truly value the local church or if you are simply going through the motions, and hopefully, they will begin to follow your good example, love the local church, and begin serving even at a young age. In this way, we are modeling the correct, God-honoring priorities and not simply jamming beliefs and values down their throats. Children are much more likely to embrace what you embrace if it is not forced or pressured upon them. Even if as your children grow and your teenage children form their own opinions, it's important that they know and understand what your views are and why you hold them. Another benefit of being intentional about cultivating a high view of what God values is that it makes decision-making so much simpler. We don't prioritize other things over God's house, so if sports and church are happening at the same time, we will miss sports to attend church. The decision was simplified. If we hold a high view of family, then it makes questions about divorce, sex, or abortion much easier to answer because we simply ask... what would a high view say? We know that God values life, God values marriage and unity and that sex is reserved for marriage, so those often controversial topics are greatly simplified, and wise answers and core convictions are easier to find and speak to our children. But if Godly values are ambiguous, vague, and confusing in our own lives, they will become stumbling blocks for our children as well.
We also need to be aware that society and the culture of the world we live in will always promote a low view of the things that God has a high view of. Through all forms of media, education, and politics, you will see an increasingly low view of church, family, the unborn, God's house, God's word, prayer, worship, a biblical view of sex, and pretty much any other idea that God instituted and values. Whatever God loves, the devil hates, and he will work to tear it down and destroy it. And whatever God hates, the devil loves and he will use all his power and influence in this world to elevate, promote, and celebrate that sin in our world. As Christian parents, we need to be willing to fight against a false narrative and be intentional to promote a God-honoring way of living in both word and action. You are not alone in this. God has given you amazing tools, like the local church, his word, prayer, and the Holy Spirit.
Ephesians 5:25
...not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.
Hebrews 10:25
Those that be planted in the house of the LORD Shall flourish in the courts of our God.
Psalm 92:13
One of the most important things we can do for our children is to both demonstrate and promote a high view of the things God has a high view of in our lives. So, what are the things God has a high view of and values? We know from scripture that God values family, marriage, the local church, serving, and generosity among other things. The point here is that God's highest priorities should also be our highest priorities. God's values should be our values. God's vision should be our vision. In that way, our children, who are always watching and learning from us (even if we don't think they are), will have a much higher likelihood of adopting those same priorities, values, and vision in their own lives as they grow into adulthood.
So what does that look like in everyday life? To hold a high view and value family as God does means that we as parents set the tone of the household and make time for family. We eat dinner together. We schedule nights when the family is together, without screens, talking and laughing together. This does not happen by accident or automatically by default; we must be intentional as parents to cultivate and lead in this. Holding a high view of marriage means that we demonstrate this by spending time with our spouse, scheduling date nights, modeling what it means to love and serve one another, and how to show affection. It also means we are careful to speak highly of marriage at all times. We don't allow ourselves to complain or vent about our spouse or degrade marriage as being a burden or a 'ball & chain'. This type of destructive talk promotes a low view of what God has a high view of. It is also planting seeds in your impressionable children's minds that are contrary to what God's word says. Be careful how you speak! Be careful that you speak highly of what God has spoken highly of.
When it comes to the local church, which is described as the Bride of Christ in scripture, this means that we as parents set the tone and prioritize going to church as a family, being involved, planting and generously giving of our time, talent, and treasure. Your convictions or lack of convictions in this area are being seen by your children. They will discern if you truly value the local church or if you are simply going through the motions, and hopefully, they will begin to follow your good example, love the local church, and begin serving even at a young age. In this way, we are modeling the correct, God-honoring priorities and not simply jamming beliefs and values down their throats. Children are much more likely to embrace what you embrace if it is not forced or pressured upon them. Even if as your children grow and your teenage children form their own opinions, it's important that they know and understand what your views are and why you hold them. Another benefit of being intentional about cultivating a high view of what God values is that it makes decision-making so much simpler. We don't prioritize other things over God's house, so if sports and church are happening at the same time, we will miss sports to attend church. The decision was simplified. If we hold a high view of family, then it makes questions about divorce, sex, or abortion much easier to answer because we simply ask... what would a high view say? We know that God values life, God values marriage and unity and that sex is reserved for marriage, so those often controversial topics are greatly simplified, and wise answers and core convictions are easier to find and speak to our children. But if Godly values are ambiguous, vague, and confusing in our own lives, they will become stumbling blocks for our children as well.
We also need to be aware that society and the culture of the world we live in will always promote a low view of the things that God has a high view of. Through all forms of media, education, and politics, you will see an increasingly low view of church, family, the unborn, God's house, God's word, prayer, worship, a biblical view of sex, and pretty much any other idea that God instituted and values. Whatever God loves, the devil hates, and he will work to tear it down and destroy it. And whatever God hates, the devil loves and he will use all his power and influence in this world to elevate, promote, and celebrate that sin in our world. As Christian parents, we need to be willing to fight against a false narrative and be intentional to promote a God-honoring way of living in both word and action. You are not alone in this. God has given you amazing tools, like the local church, his word, prayer, and the Holy Spirit.
RESOURCE
Would you like to go deeper? Click the link to watch this True North resource on “Conviction in the Age of Compromise”.